I learned a very important lesson today, and at work no less. Who knew?
As I was closing my shift up for the day, someone walked into the office and was chatting it up with one of my coworkers, who had a very concerned look on his face when the person said he could do magic. Out of all the looneys that come in here, he's worried about the guy 'who can do magic'. My friend doubts it, but the guy is insistent, so my friend asks him to perform. So, the customer points at me, closes his eyes, and says... "His name is Jay."
Odd, because I'm pretty sure I've never seen this guy. Ever.
Again, he's insistent, so I have to know.
"How do you know my name, have you come by here before?"
"No, but I know you."
Often enough, at this point I'll laugh, say something like "Thanks for watchin'!" and head off in the opposite direction, leaving them to wonder if I'm on tv or something too, but I couldn't in this situation, so I pushed and tried to figure out where he knew me.
"Seriously, how could you possibly know me?"
"Remember? We were in training together at Nu Skin"
...
That was EIGHT friggin' years ago. After that training group I never (repeat: NEVER) saw another member of my training group. The training was a couple of weeks, and I pretty much kept to myself. I thought it was a little more than just plain creepy that he not only remembered me, but my mannerisms in that training class, and some of the answers I provided there.
Seriously, I barely remember working for Nu Skin. It wasn't exactly the happiest time of my life. Honestly, I was pretty curious about who he was, but he seemed really offended that I couldn't remember his name and stormed (that's right, stormed) out of our office. I'm thinking in eight more years he'll find me again and either pull another magic trick, or I'll be the target of some rage induced, gun toting, carnage. In either case, I'm very weirded out.
This just goes to show you, there are people that can remember EVERYTHING. These are people who could excel at school given their natural ability to never forget anything, but no, they choose, instead, to be as creepy as 38 year old dudes who hang out at high school football games to 'relive the dream'.
Be careful how you act infront of random people, I guess.
Friday, April 10, 2009
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Habaneros
So, I've heard that Habaneros are hot. I didn't really believe it, but I heard it. I just figured somewhere around the spiciness of a Jalapeno, maybe a little hotter. Meh.
It turns out, that on the Scoville Scale Jalapenos are ranked at number 4 on the list with between 2500 and 8000 heat units, or whatever they call it, I guess it's SR according to the world's most reliable online encyclopedia (sarcasm /off) wikipedia.org. Conversely bell peppers are ranked at 0 with 0 SR. What I didn't know yesterday, is that Habaneros rank in at 8 with between 100,000 and 350,000 SR. So, at the maximum of around 40 times hotter than a Jalapeno. In terms of scale alone there are only two peppers hotter than the Habanero.
So, yesterday, my roommate wanted to make some spicy sauce and bought a few of them along with a selection of other peppers. He was also nice enough to save a habanero for me, since I was curious and kind of wanted to try one.
Was I in for a treat!
Here's the story, as accurate as I can remember, and undoctored despite my embarrassment:
Habaneros are little, balbous and orange. I think it might be to disuade you from eating them. In any case, when my roommate was done making his homemade death sauce, he handed me the pepper, and I, being the cautious soul that I am, nibbled the bottom corner of the pepper. Heh, not bad, I thought. Kind of sweet, tastes a little like a bell pepper. Not hot in the slightest. I took another bite, bigger this time, and still no spiciness. I figured I was home free, so I took an even larger bite on top of one of the others. Little did I know, that the actual hotness isn't in the fruit of the pepper, but in the seeds and the meat in the chamber inside. This bite contained just a tiny amount of that ribbing, though I can't be sure if there was a seed in there.
Seconds later I felt my lips go a mysterious numb, and then the heat got rapidly turned up from a balmy, yet comfortable room temperature to a close approximation to the surface of the sun, and no, it was not done yet. Exactly .03 seconds later the heat had proceeded from my lips to the little hanging ball at the end of my throat, commonly known as the Uvula. Beyond that the reaction was pretty immediate, and I entered panic mode. I wasn't sure what I was supposed to be tasting besides pain and I just started running around the kitchen screaming about the heat, to which my roommates started laughing, hysterically. Instics drove me to the fridge and I pulled out all of my roommates' milk to find my gallon, anxiously awaiting a purpose in the back of the fridge and right from the container I had to have downed at least a quarter, and much to my panic, it had done nothing for me.
Amidst the tears of laughter my two roommates scramble for some sugar water while I run to the door and fling it open, for what purpose I don't yet know. I stood on our porch and started sucking in the cool post winter air in long, very loud gasps, to which my neighbors all found hilarious. I run back into the apartment and start trying to work the little twisty tie on the bread, but keep tying it tighter rather than opening it. Finally after what seemed like hours my roommates finish stirring the sugar water and I start to down it. I swish that stuff around like listerine and for a few seconds clarity returns and I can no longer feel the pain. In the garbage is all that remains of the pepper, and on the floor are partially chewed up pepper bits.
After about 10, or 20 good minutes and half a gallon of sugar water normal functions returned in my mouth and my roommates stopped laughing.
Habaneros are hot. Unless you're really bored, just ignore the urge to try one.
It turns out, that on the Scoville Scale Jalapenos are ranked at number 4 on the list with between 2500 and 8000 heat units, or whatever they call it, I guess it's SR according to the world's most reliable online encyclopedia (sarcasm /off) wikipedia.org. Conversely bell peppers are ranked at 0 with 0 SR. What I didn't know yesterday, is that Habaneros rank in at 8 with between 100,000 and 350,000 SR. So, at the maximum of around 40 times hotter than a Jalapeno. In terms of scale alone there are only two peppers hotter than the Habanero.
So, yesterday, my roommate wanted to make some spicy sauce and bought a few of them along with a selection of other peppers. He was also nice enough to save a habanero for me, since I was curious and kind of wanted to try one.
Was I in for a treat!
Here's the story, as accurate as I can remember, and undoctored despite my embarrassment:
Habaneros are little, balbous and orange. I think it might be to disuade you from eating them. In any case, when my roommate was done making his homemade death sauce, he handed me the pepper, and I, being the cautious soul that I am, nibbled the bottom corner of the pepper. Heh, not bad, I thought. Kind of sweet, tastes a little like a bell pepper. Not hot in the slightest. I took another bite, bigger this time, and still no spiciness. I figured I was home free, so I took an even larger bite on top of one of the others. Little did I know, that the actual hotness isn't in the fruit of the pepper, but in the seeds and the meat in the chamber inside. This bite contained just a tiny amount of that ribbing, though I can't be sure if there was a seed in there.
Seconds later I felt my lips go a mysterious numb, and then the heat got rapidly turned up from a balmy, yet comfortable room temperature to a close approximation to the surface of the sun, and no, it was not done yet. Exactly .03 seconds later the heat had proceeded from my lips to the little hanging ball at the end of my throat, commonly known as the Uvula. Beyond that the reaction was pretty immediate, and I entered panic mode. I wasn't sure what I was supposed to be tasting besides pain and I just started running around the kitchen screaming about the heat, to which my roommates started laughing, hysterically. Instics drove me to the fridge and I pulled out all of my roommates' milk to find my gallon, anxiously awaiting a purpose in the back of the fridge and right from the container I had to have downed at least a quarter, and much to my panic, it had done nothing for me.
Amidst the tears of laughter my two roommates scramble for some sugar water while I run to the door and fling it open, for what purpose I don't yet know. I stood on our porch and started sucking in the cool post winter air in long, very loud gasps, to which my neighbors all found hilarious. I run back into the apartment and start trying to work the little twisty tie on the bread, but keep tying it tighter rather than opening it. Finally after what seemed like hours my roommates finish stirring the sugar water and I start to down it. I swish that stuff around like listerine and for a few seconds clarity returns and I can no longer feel the pain. In the garbage is all that remains of the pepper, and on the floor are partially chewed up pepper bits.
After about 10, or 20 good minutes and half a gallon of sugar water normal functions returned in my mouth and my roommates stopped laughing.
Habaneros are hot. Unless you're really bored, just ignore the urge to try one.
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